Mom status or wife?

In the military, when someone decides to retire, a ceremony of some sorts is usually given. There's a part in the traditional ceremony where they retiring member expresses their graditude to their kids and spouse as they have stood by you the entire time, making unheard of sacrifices. Then there is another part of the ceremony where other people could be thanked, example: mom, friends, mentors...etc. Yes those people are important, but they haven't lived the sacrifices the kids and spouse have. They don't know the triumphs and trying to figure out how to tell your babies, daddy will be home in 6 months, but whatever. Having that ONE moment in the past 30 years be about just you and the girls, not sharing it with anyone, completely crushed. My desire to even want to be involed with this event came to a scretching hault when I found out that my girls and I were being presented at the same time as the mom. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?? What does she know about sacrifices being made? She seen her kids, spouse, friends daily. She got to stay in the same area for 30 FUCKING years, but yes lets thank her for all her sacrifices when you have literally missed vital important details of our kids life; moved us from here to there; no support from family, including her. BUT whatever. I guess me being upset about that makes it seems I am childish, but it's definitely not that. It's just one more thing to prove where not only our kids stand, but myself included.